Letters to My Daughter, October 2017

My dearest kimchi,

I attended several junior varsity volleyball games where you played, and I watched you with delight. 

You did the unexpected, the unthinkable. Like scoring four serves in a row or returning a ball that was difficult to maneuver. Hello, fast legs and muscle! 

You see...you maybe didn't know or realize it at first. But, you have it in you. You have the power to do remarkable things, the unthinkable things. You just have to remain calm and believe it. 

Do not think otherwise. 

Set your mind to your goals, focus, and you will get there. 

You are the little engine that could! 

XOXO,

Bimbimbap

Letters to My Daughter, September 2017

My dearest pickle,

September is here, and it means a new academic year!

You will be going to a new school this year. Even further than your previous school in Astoria. You will be a Manhattanite! How did you feel about that?

You had wanted to go to this school since you were in sixth grade but I decided that it was too much for you to wake up very early and get home late when you were only in sixth grade. I understand and support your passion for learning, but I also do not want to make going to school to stressful that it becomes a burden. 

We talked about the fact that you would have to wake up at 5:40 AM. We talked about the possibility that you may have to stay up late if you have plenty of homework. We discussed commuting during winter. I had worries about all these. You said, "I have to make a sacrifice if I want to have a good education." Dang! What else could I say? Why would I say no to the excitement on your face about going to this new school? Your happiness is my happiness. 

It was a busy start - choosing after-school programs, electives, signing you up for the new grading tool, figuring out the dynamic of the school, getting yourself familiar with the new schedule, and getting to know your new classmates and teachers. But I believe, the best lessons you learned so far are:


1. Being admitted to the volleyball junior varsity team. You didn't think you would make it, but you did. The coach said that he was looking for students who show efforts to learn and progress. So I guess you did. :)

2. It is OK to share your thoughts and interest. You were placed in Women and History elective. Although this was one of your choices, you wanted to do Jazz Band and play trumpet again. I suggested you talk to Mr. Fisher, which you did. Look who is the Jazz Band team now?

3. Taking responsibility for your actions. Shits happen. This time you lost your MTA card, one week after the school started. I am sorry that I got upset. Soon after we got home, you emailed Donna about the incident, who later said how impressed she was with what you did because you showed that you took responsibility.

As for me? I learned to start letting you go. Because, although I still worry like s*#!t, I trust that you will be fine. 

I love you to pieces, pickle!
xoxo
Your dill

Letters to My Daughter, August 2017

My Cenil,
 
We had been waiting for this month because we were going home this month! Hello, Jakarta!

This year, we stayed shorter, but it was fair to say that we traveled more this year. 

We traveled to Bogor with Opa Win, Opa Iwan, Oma Feli, Mba Tinah, Mba Lia, and Pak Tolani. Yeah, quite a big group, eh? I am sure Oma Yuli was there with us too. We spent two nights at Novotel Bogor, and the three of us (you, Opa Win and myself) shared a king-size bedroom, so we shared the bed. All I can say was that it was a hilarious, memorable experience. You dragged the blanket (and Opa's sarong) with you, so Opa Win had to sleep half..... You put your left leg on top of his thigh and accidentally pressed the urine bag. It was a flood in the early morning hours!

Every morning, I stared at both of you sleeping side by side. It was a beautiful view that warmed my heart. 

We enjoyed our buffet breakfast very much; it was probably one of the things you always looked forward to every morning. We had lunch at Cimory. We tried their staple food. We visited a famous pie place, and we had lunch Kebun Raya Bogor and strolled around. 

I wanted everyone to enjoy this short getaway, so I always let everyone had their meal first while I fed Opa Win. And, I was OK with that. What really, really touched me was the fact that you always spared your food for me. You knew I always ate last, and you made sure I had something to eat. I am in awe!

This year is also the second year of girls only traveling. We chose Bangkok. It was hot and humid, and although Bangkok is pretty much similar to Jakarta as a big city, it was still a new experience. We visited temples, tried their street food, rode their subway system, walked thousands of miles to visit places. We celebrated my birthday with donut and pad Thai for breakfast. Best.birthday.food.evaaaa!

Out of this experience, one thing stood out for me. Your maturity, sensitivity, responsibility, and problem-solving skills. When I had to care Opa Win, you took over accompanying Opa Iwan and Oma Feli by sharing a table with them. And no, I didn't tell or ask you to do it. It was your initiative. When you realized you forgot to bring an adaptor, you solved the problem by speaking with the front desk staff and borrowed an adaptor from them. 

When it comes to managing chaos at home, you reminded me to be fair. You shared my headache and helped me chose the best words to communicate. You understood the delicacy and sensitivity of the situation I had to face.

I will always remember that every afternoon, you would patiently sit near the bathroom and wait for Opa Win to finish his shower. You would then help put the food rests on the wheelchair and later push it to the veranda. One thing you said struck me, "Opa is not sick. He is just in a different condition."

I don't know what you are made of, and I don't know what I did to deserve you. I think you are made of love, grace, humility, resilience, loyalty. I am humbled and honored to be able to call you mine. 

This month is a month full of beautiful memories and valuable life experience. 

Jars of stars,
XOXO
Bunbun


 

Letter to My Daughter, July 2017


Wow! We went places this month!

I had to attend my first General Synod in Baltimore, Maryland for four days. I couldn't imagine being separated from you that long. So I went with a heavy heart because I knew I would miss you terribly. But in a situation like this, I always remember what Oma once told me - that sometimes we both need to learn to be away from each other so that we can feel, cherish, and reaffirm our bond. 

Papa was still on long-term disability. Although this upset me, there’s certainly a benefit from this situation. You don’t have to go to summer camp, which means I got to save some money and you could spend more time with him! And with Tako, both of you can go places (and sometimes me). I am so happy that you had a great time and that you can go places conveniently now. 

You and papa scoured Brooklyn and tried out restaurants while I was stuck at the General Synod. Beuh! But I am so happy and grateful that we were able to go places with more ease now. 

This month's letter is more of a reflection of our adventure this summer:

Madame Tussaud Museum
Rockaway Beach
Fire Island
Pine Forest
Eddie Ice Cream
Sunflower Field Buttonwood

Cheers to more adventures, dumpling!

XOXO

Letter to My Daughter, June 2017

My dearest Cenil,

I feel that June is always one of the busiest months of the year. Recital, dance performance, and graduation. 

But I want to take a moment to say that I am grateful and feel so relieved this month. Your dance recital usually ends pretty late. In the past, we had to wait for buses and got home very late. So, I made a goal and a plan to purchase a car this month so that you do not have to wait for a bus or taxi after a late recital. 

I am super happy that I was able to achieve that goal (Yes, I passed my driving test too on the first attempt!). We named our first car Takoyaki. 

For the first time, you performed four dances this year, and you nailed all of them. 

This month, you also said goodbye to Q300. It was bittersweet. Although it was a short stay, I am sure it was memorable. You made new friends, learned new skills, and your personality has grown so much. 

You learned about self-awareness by putting together a presentation for a student-led conference, won first place in the Coca-Cola project, attended your first UN Conference, learned Capoeira, and baked donuts to raise money for the homeless.  Of course, not everything worked the way we wanted, but I am sure looking back; you would see your experience at Q300 as one of the most valuable lessons you could ever learn. 

Please stay curious, persistent, and resourceful. 

I love you!
Bunda Cetot

Letters to My Daughter, May 2017

Boo-yah!

The long waiting process for school acceptance has ended! And congratulations for being accepted into the Anderson and BSGE!

My heart bursts to see your happiness. 

"How do you feel?" I asked.

"Elated!" you said. 

My little one, you may be little but you have taught me so much. 

You have taught me:

1. To never lose hope

2. To do what is right, not what is easy

3. To find the fun in everything

In my effort to find an opportunity that is in-line with my passion, I received many rejections to a point where I believed there is something wrong with me and that I am not worth it. 

I turned to you because I knew you would be saying something that was comforting. But what you said, I was not ready to hear. 

You asked, "Have you fully accepted the fact that you are here now?"

I said no. 

You looked at me and continued, "You need to fully accept that you are here now, try to learn something, and that's when Jesus know that you are ready to move on."

"How did you come up with that?"

You shrugged. "My brain...I guess."

Thank you for always seeing the good in me. Thank you for being my compass. How blessed I am to have you!

BunBun

Sussex County Sunflower Maze, New Jersey

We (well, I...) have been wanting to go to a sunflower maze for the last few years with not much luck.

The first attempt was to visit is sunflower field in Connecticut, only to learn that we were way too early so they were not open yet.

And we usually spend our Summer back home, coming back to NY a way to late for sunflower blooms.

But this year, I found out about the  Sussex County Sunflower Maze in New Jersey. This sunflower fields has two big mazes and they plant the seeds alternatively, so even when the first maze has passed the blooming session, the second maze still has a lot of blooming sunflowers.

Admission is $5/person and each one of us gets to pick one sunflower to bring home.

The maze is big and fun to walk around or to play hide and seek. :)

Letters to My Daughter, April 2017

Dear popsicle,

April is tiring. Don't you think?

The weather is bleak. Most of the days, it is raining.

You are tired. I am tired.

Earlier this month, the Anderson school informed us that you were on their waiting list. You seemed OK when you learned the news. I will not forget the day when we were laughing hysterically, and within seconds, your laughter turned into tears.

Waiting is not fun. Add waiting for school acceptance news to the equation. You said that most of your friends already knew which schools they are going to next year. But you were still waiting. You felt that you were the only one who was still waiting. The uncertainty is overwhelming. My heart broke. I understand how you felt, but at that time, I lost for words.

I can only say that you should be proud of yourself, of how far you have developed, of all the hard work you have put into each task, of all the persistence in finishing a task in a complete and perfect state, and how much you have achieved.

  • Valedictorian speech. Enough said!

  • The Coke project. You and Almer won the first place for this project! You navigated this complicated project in such grace. You worked well with your partner, dividing and conquering each intricate task. You did a detailed calculation of the profit, packaging volume, and waste cost. You created a mock-up of the new packaging, put together a presentation, and practiced hard. Betty shared with me that you earned respect from your classmates and that they agreed that you should earn the first place. 

  • The first camping trip with Global Kids. They only accepted six students and you really wanted to go. So, you wrote an essay as part of the application process. Then a few weeks later, you handed me a thick envelope that started with a congratulatory letter. You came back from the trip tired, hungry, and sleepy. But we both knew that you learned new skills and gained new experience. Now, you have another story to add to your collection.

  • Sharing your voice. Shortly after we learned that you were on the Anderson School's waiting list, we discussed what we should do. Should we wait? Should we nag them? And you decided to write an email to show your continued interest. My dumpling, I can not guarantee that they will immediately accept you after they read this letter. But what I can guarantee is that they now know that you are a dedicated, committed, and a wonderfully wonderful person. 

  • Attended the Model UN conference, where you mingled with other students whom you had never met before and stepped out of your comfort zone by sharing your opinion and ideas. 

  • Participated in various admission tests. This required continuous focus, determination, hard work, persistence, and high stamina. All of which you possess. 

I am not sharing this to say that you are so awesome so that the world owes you a living. I am saying this as a reminder that when you put your focus and effort on things you would like to accomplish, you can do it.

You are the dimple to my freckle and I love you tons.
BunBun

Ms. C

I first met Ms. C when she was six months old, and her personality immediately captured my heart. Then I got the privilege to document her first birthday.

Three years later, her mom asked me to take her pictures again, to which I immediately said yes. I mean, who could resist those big eyes, beautiful curls, and cute face?